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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26930269">Someone Like You</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/zuppi/pseuds/zuppi'>zuppi</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Dragon Prince (Cartoon)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Aged-Up Character(s), Angst and Romance, Emotional Infidelity, F/M, Infidelity, post-Through the Moon</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 02:21:34</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>5,819</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26930269</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/zuppi/pseuds/zuppi</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes in trying to protect them, we cannot help but hurt the ones we love most. </p>
<p>(Post Through The Moon fic. Contains spoilers for the comic.)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Callum/Rayla (The Dragon Prince)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>76</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>69</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Old friends</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Years after running away to seek out Viren by herself, Rayla is forced back into contact with humans. </p>
<p>----------</p>
<p>So this story has been sitting on my hard drive since before I finished Husk. At the time, I didn't want to write angst after angst, so I put it on the back burner until I had finished some of my other WIPS. </p>
<p>It was actually almost finished (bar an explanatory flashback) which Through The Moon kindly provided for me. So I elected to dust it off and let it loose. </p>
<p>Fair warning, I have written two endings for this and I am still unsure which I will ultimately go with. </p>
<p>If you are unprepared for a potentially sad ending, you may prefer not to proceed.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Her anxiety reaches a fever pitch as they cross the bridge and pass into Katolis castle.</p>
<p>It has been steadily increasing since they left Xadia.</p>
<p>Since the council made this a condition of removing her Ghost spell.</p>
<p>Perhaps if she had anywhere else to go, she would have refused them.</p>
<p>It feels vindictive, though she knows it’s not. They have no idea of the true extent of her history here and she is the logical choice to represent the Moonshadow elves of the Silvergrove.</p>
<p>She helped bring Azymondias back to Xadia, fought at the Battle of the Storm Spire… she’s spent years tracking down dark mages and forging alliances with other elven groups.</p>
<p>She’s gone on many trips to other human kingdoms, diplomatic missions, negotiated the return of various artifacts and relics.</p>
<p>All in search of Viren and now also Claudia…</p>
<p>She knows more about humans and their customs than any other Moonshadow elf.</p>
<p>She could hardly plead her case either. The council already thought her overly emotional due to the influence of humans, if she told them she didn’t think she could face him, they would have questioned her sanity.</p>
<p>Moonshadow elves did not show fear.</p>
<p>And they certainly did not show fear due to not wanting to see some childhood sweetheart.</p>
<p>She sees Kazi glance at her. They have known each other for some time now, not that they are especially close but Kazi knows of her history here better than anyone else.</p>
<p>They are clearly concerned.</p>
<p>The group enters the courtyard and Rayla sees the luna vine they planted that first summer has finally grown across the archway leading to the stables. It is in full bloom, and she imagines it will smell wonderful at night when new flowers open.</p>
<p>Her mind flicks back to the day they planted it, fingers grubby and sun beating down on their backs.</p>
<p>Not long after returning Zym. A day or so before that trip to the Moon Nexus.</p>
<p>When they were still young and carefree.</p>
<p>She and Ezran did the bulk of the work while Callum sketched them. She teased him about it later.</p>
<p>She looks around the delegation gathered to welcome them, smiling slightly as Ezran steps forward.</p>
<p>King Ezran.</p>
<p>Still looking too young and innocent for the heavy title.</p>
<p>Fifteen years old the previous month.</p>
<p>He has shot up in recent years and she suspects he would now be taller than her, horns and all.</p>
<p>Callum was his age when she left. Exactly that morning, in fact.</p>
<p>Ezran looks so young. So much younger than she felt when she took off on her own, looking for Viren.</p>
<p>She tries to keep her eyes on Ezran, resisting the temptation to look at the other humans.</p>
<p> Surely, <em>he</em> will be among them.</p>
<p>It’s been years.</p>
<p>She feels like a completely different person. Tired, weary.</p>
<p>Lonely.</p>
<p>She told herself she would be unaffected by seeing him, but she knows now she was only fooling herself.</p>
<p>She feels sick from the conflict... desperately wanting to see him but terrified of what his reaction will be.</p>
<p>What hers will be.</p>
<p>They dismount their various steeds and hand them over to the stable hands, then step forward to Ezran.</p>
<p>She tries to hang at the back.</p>
<p>“Welcome to Katolis.” Ezran smiles at them and she remembers it’s not just Callum she misses. He steps forward to greet each elf individually.</p>
<p>Ezran spots her before he reaches her.</p>
<p>She sees his mouth drop and he stops mid-sentence. The elf he is talking to follows his eyes, confused.</p>
<p>She swallows nervously, a small smile on her lips as she inclines her head slightly.</p>
<p>His eyes dart to the group of humans behind him and hers naturally follow.</p>
<p>And she seems him.</p>
<p>Her stomach drops and her blood runs cold.</p>
<p>He is dressed in familiar blues and reds. His hair cut a little shorter than before and his jaw a little sharper.</p>
<p>The woman on his arm is also new.</p>
<p>She thought she had prepared herself for this too but hearing that the eldest prince of Katolis was to be wed to a noble woman from Del Bar was different to seeing it.</p>
<p>She’s pretty. Beautiful actually. Shorter than average for a human, with an hour-glass figure heavily complimented by her extravagant dress.</p>
<p>She smiles at him and Rayla recognises the look.</p>
<p>She’s fond of him.</p>
<p>Loves him perhaps.</p>
<p>This was supposed to be a strategic marriage. One to broker peace between their unstable lands but looking at their close proximity, Rayla begins to wonder…</p>
<p>She feels like she has been kicked in the gut. Seeing them together takes her breath away and she finds herself blinking back tears. She chokes back a sob, concentrating on her breathing as the courtyard begins to spin.</p>
<p>Callum seems to sense the sudden change in mood, and he looks up at Ezran. His eyes then follow Ezran's line of sight and he looks over at where she’s standing.</p>
<p>They make eye contact and she sees the colour drain from his face. She sees him swallow and his eyes look glassy.</p>
<p>His fiancée notices the change in disposition and says something to him, her hand coming up to touch his face.</p>
<p>Rayla forces herself to look away, her breath catching in her throat.</p>
<p>Ezran collects himself and continues greeting the elves but she can see he’s distracted. His eyes continually flick behind him but Rayla won’t allow hers to follow.</p>
<p>He finally reaches her.</p>
<p>“Rayla.” His voice is tight and Rayla feels her heart constrict at his cold tone and even more icy eyes.</p>
<p>Of course, Ez is angry with her too. She expected as much but it doesn’t make it any easier.</p>
<p>“King Ezran.” She breathes, her eyes downcast as she blinks back tears.</p>
<p>It was a mistake coming here.</p>
<p>Ezran sighs and she glances at him, sees his face soften just a fraction.</p>
<p>“I’m happy to see you’re okay.”</p>
<p>He has tears in his eyes too.</p>
<p>They are escorted to their rooms so they can wash and change before their meal. Rayla cannot help but glance in Callum’s direction as the elves go one way and the humans another.</p>
<p>Her heart drops when his eyes don't so much as move in her direction.</p>
<p>She takes a deep breath. That's good.</p>
<p>He's moved on. She had worried he would have spent the last five years pining for her.</p>
<p>As much as she misses him, she wants him to be happy.</p>
<p>She can see the guards whisper as she passes, though she tries to ignore them. To her credit, Opeli is professional as always as she guides the contingent through the hallways.</p>
<p>Rayla washes and changes quickly but finds herself spending longer than usual on her hair. She had taken to wearing it up in recent years and goes to do so after washing…</p>
<p>
  <em>“You have such beautiful hair.” </em>
</p>
<p>His words ring in her memory… the ghostly feel of his hands through her strands rising goose bumps on her skin.</p>
<p>He had liked her hair down. He said it was more interesting to sketch.</p>
<p>She briefly considers leaving it loose but eventually elects to tie it up.</p>
<p>She looks at herself in the mirror. She thinks she looks well, though she would be more comfortable in pants than a dress. The elders have expressed that they expect her to conform to traditions, however, and so she elects to wear one of the gowns they sent with her.</p>
<p>While tonight will not strictly be a ball, there will be a formal dinner followed by drinks and mingling after.</p>
<p>She would be expected to dress up.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>~~~</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>She sips her wine as she stands in the group of elves. They are chatting easily, though she is not listening in the slightest. Her eyes continually dart to the open doors, both yearning for and dreading his arrival.</p>
<p>King Ezran is announced with minimal fanfare, though Rayla knows (knew) him well enough to tell he is still not comfortable with it.</p>
<p>Ez smiles as he enters the banquet hallway, inclining his head at various elves and humans as he makes his way through the crowd. She cannot help but feel a swell of pride. He has truly grown into his role.</p>
<p>Despite the immense mental effort, she looks behind him though and, as she expected, Callum is following.</p>
<p>The woman, Saoirse she remembers, is on his arm again. She is chatting animatedly to him but Rayla can tell Callum is distracted. It is subtle, for sure, but she knows him well enough to know he is uneasy.</p>
<p>The slight tension in his shoulders, how his eyebrows are just that little drawn together… the smile that doesn’t quite reach his eyes.</p>
<p>“You look like you could do with more wine.”</p>
<p>Rayla looks away from him to see Kazi with a glass extended in her direction.</p>
<p>Reluctantly, she tears her eyes away from Callum and accepts the offering.</p>
<p>“Thanks.” Her voice sounds small, even to her.</p>
<p>“Are you… ok?” Kazi looks uncomfortable. Rayla knows they are not the most extroverted of elves and she appreciates they are looking out for her.</p>
<p>She sighs, taking a gulp of wine. “Questioning every decision in my life right now but otherwise…” She deadpans.</p>
<p>Kazi smiles in commiseration. They were also thrust into something they are clearly uncomfortable with.</p>
<p>A hush falls over the hall and she turns for find Ezran standing at the head of the table, smiling fondly at all assembled.</p>
<p>“Welcome, everyone. Thank you all for coming to celebrate the signing of the treaty. With this, we are one step closer to unifying the continent and enjoying a closer relationship between the Pentarchy and Xadia-”</p>
<p>Rayla tries to pay attention to Ez but he eyes slowly wander around the hall in search of Callum. He is not difficult to locate. Her eyes fall on him to find him staring intently at her.</p>
<p>He’s watching her… his face sad and hurt.</p>
<p>Her breath catches once again and she looks away from him, ashamed.</p>
<p>Ashamed for lying to him. For disappearing in the night and leaving him behind after promising they would work together.</p>
<p>Humiliated that even now, she still hasn’t located Viren. Hasn’t been able to ensure he is <em>truly</em> safe.</p>
<p>She glances back at him and he’s still staring at her but his face has changed.</p>
<p>He no longer looks regretful.</p>
<p>Now he looks angry.</p>
<p>She looks away again as the room starts to swim before her eyes.</p>
<p>Depositing her glass on a table, she slips from the hallway, her heart racing in her chest.</p>
<p>She rushes down the hall, cursing the long skirts the twist around her legs.</p>
<p>“Rayla.”</p>
<p>She cannot help the shiver that runs down her spine as Callum calls out to her. Despite her better judgement she turns to look at him.</p>
<p>They stare at each other across the deserted hallway.</p>
<p>There is something about the experience that reminds her of their first meeting.</p>
<p>His eyes are once again wide, staring at her… but he has changed so much since then. He’s taller, broad shouldered. He carries himself with so much more confidence than he did when they were younger, though, upon closer look, she can see a slight tremble in his jaw.</p>
<p>“So… that’s it? You’re just going to pretend… what? Nothing happened between us?” He looks anguished yet furious.</p>
<p>“Callum,-” She sighs, the pain in her chest making it hard to breathe.</p>
<p>He grits his teeth, stepping closer to her. “You just <em>fucking</em> left!” His voice is eerily quiet, tears glistening in his eyes.</p>
<p>“I had to-”</p>
<p>“No.” He spits. “You didn’t. You lied to me. Lied to my face. You promised we would go together.” He steps closer again. “You just fucking disappeared!”</p>
<p>Her breath catches in her throat and she blinks tears she promised she wouldn’t shed from her eyes.</p>
<p>He never swore at her.</p>
<p>Not before.</p>
<p>He takes another step closer. “I went looking for you. To the Silvergrove. The Storm Spire. Even Lux Auria.” His breath hitches audibly and he takes a second to steady himself. “I didn’t know if you were alive or dead.”</p>
<p>She looks down, ashamed of making him worry so. “I’m sorry.” Her voice is barely above a whisper.</p>
<p>“Rayla.” He steps nearer to her again.</p>
<p>They are close enough to touch now.</p>
<p>Rayla sighs, the feel of him being so close still electrifying, even after all these years apart.</p>
<p>He takes a final step forward and they are only just <em>not</em> touching now. His forehead is <em>almost</em> pressed against hers and his hair tickles her skin.</p>
<p>Her breath comes in pants and she feels light-headed.</p>
<p>This is exactly the sort of thing she shouldn’t be doing. Just such a scenario has played out in her imagination and she promised herself she was strong enough to keep to the plan.</p>
<p>He reaches for her but stops just short and she chides herself for feeling disappointment.</p>
<p>Longing.</p>
<p>“Rayla.” He whispers, finally closing the small distance between them. He touches her gently, his fingers barely caressing her waist.</p>
<p>She can feel his breath ghosting across her lips.</p>
<p>She feels drunk, intoxicated by the feeling of him, so close after years of imaging it.</p>
<p>Dreaming of it.</p>
<p>“Callum.” Her own voice is husky, nothing like the cautious tone she knows she should project.</p>
<p>“I still love you.” He slips his hands around her slender waist to her back and presses his cheek against hers.</p>
<p>He still gives her butterflies.</p>
<p>She wants to pull away. Step back. Tell him they are done.</p>
<p>Over.</p>
<p>She wants to do that...</p>
<p>But she can’t.</p>
<p>“Do you still love me?” He breathes against her ear, hesitating.</p>
<p>She knows she should say no. They are over. It’s been almost five years. They should have both moved on…</p>
<p>He’s getting married next month.</p>
<p>She knows she should say these things, but her breath catches in her throat as his lips press lightly against her cheek.</p>
<p>She is powerless.</p>
<p>He pauses for another agonising second, as he leans back slightly, his eyes searching... and then his lips are on hers.</p>
<p>She cannot help but sigh in longing. They stumble backwards, connecting harshly with the rough stone of the castle walls. Gasping in shock and yearning, her own hands come up to clutch at him.</p>
<p>He moans into her mouth, one hand now cupping her face.</p>
<p>Callum deepens the kiss as he presses her hard against the wall, both of them panting.</p>
<p>She feels alive for the first time in years. Her body reacts to him as it always has done. She can feel her heart pounding in her ears, blood rushing through her veins, heat building between her legs...</p>
<p>This is perfect.</p>
<p>“Callum.” Utilising all of her mental strength, she turns her face away.</p>
<p>He whimpers into her neck, his fingers raking through her hair. “<em>Don’t</em>.”</p>
<p>He clearly knows what is coming.</p>
<p>She puts her hands on his shoulders, gently but firmly trying to push him away. “We can’t.”</p>
<p>“Why?” He sighs shakily, his lips on the delicate skin of her neck.</p>
<p>“You know why.” She pushes harder and he steps back slightly.</p>
<p>“I don’t.” He grimaces. “I don’t know why.”</p>
<p> She takes a breath to steady herself. “You’re getting married.”</p>
<p>He snorts. “You know that’s political.”</p>
<p>“It doesn’t matter.” Her voice is low as she slips past him.</p>
<p>“I only agreed to it because I thought I’d never see you again.” He steps closer to her once more. “Because I thought you didn’t love me any more.” He reaches for her as she steps back. “But you do, don’t you?”</p>
<p>She tries to swallow past the lump in her throat. She can’t deny it. “We shouldn’t be doing this.”</p>
<p>“I’ll call it off.” He looks frantic, desperate, as he grabs her hand. “We can go wherever you want. Xadia, the human kingdoms. Anywhere. Just as long as we're toget-”</p>
<p>“No.” She whispers, pulling her arm back. “No. You know that’s ridiculous.” She turns away, knows she has to get away from him and the tempting things he is saying.</p>
<p>“So that’s it?” He spits, following her. “Just, no?”</p>
<p>She rolls her eyes at him as she increases her pace. “You can’t just call off the wedding. Katolis and Del Bar have been negotiating this treaty for years. Do you want all-out war in the human lands?”</p>
<p>“We’ll renegotiate!” He grabs her by the shoulder and pulls her around to look at him. “We’ll figure it out. Rayla, I want to be with <em>you</em>. I want to marry <em>you</em>. We can talk to them. Make them understand.”</p>
<p>She inhales sharply at his sweet words. They had never spoken of marriage; they were too young but she’d ways hoped... “We're not naive teenagers any more, Callum.” Her voice breaks and she turns away from him, desperate to get to her room where she can break down. “This isn’t a children’s story. Not everyone gets a happy ever after.”</p>
<p>“You’re a coward.” He calls after her but doesn’t follow this time. “You’re still that scared girl from the oasis. You haven’t changed at all.”</p>
<p>She can’t help but look back at him, his words cutting through her. He looks utterly miserable.</p>
<p>He’s lashing out, trying to get a reaction from her.</p>
<p>She sees that it is all he has left.</p>
<p>“Goodbye Callum.” She breathes before she continues on to her room.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Go Your Own Way</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Rayla tries to play her role as an elven representative while doing her best to avoid Callum.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thanks, as always, to everyone who kudos'ed, commented or otherwise interacted with the last chapter. </p><p>I've been wanting to up-date this for a while but life has been beyond hectic. It's somehow even more hectic right now, but my brain has zero interest in Purgatory or Zoom-mates, so I guess progress is progress...</p><p>Title from <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ul-cZyuYq4">Go Your Own Way - Fleetwood Mac</a> because I am old and this song gives me feels.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>She doesn’t see him much over the next few days. They are all busy with treaties and round tables. They generally break into smaller groups for this and it seems that he is never in hers.</p><p>Which she should be grateful for but isn’t.</p><p>She sees Ezran frequently, though never in private. Which she <em>is</em> grateful for. Its all too hard and nothing good can come of it. She can’t imagine explaining herself any better to him than his brother. She imagines Ezran would be more understanding, more willing to see things from her perspective... after all, she didn’t lie directly to his face.</p><p>But he is also disappointed in her, angry in his own understandable way, and its more than she can bare right now.</p><p>Soren manages to catch her late one evening. She’s waking to her room with Kazi and an Earthblood who's not taken the hints she’s not interested. She’s emotionally and physically exhausted when they turn a corner and run into the broad blond man, either coming off or going on duty.</p><p>He smiles at her, openly and happily, which makes her heartache. Soren never really seemed one to hold grudges.</p><p>She waves the others on and she and Soren chat briefly. He shows her a drawing of his wife and small baby. Rayla’s heartbeats painfully in her chest, both for missing something as wonderful as this... but also because she instantly recognises the hand that drew Soren’s beautiful picture.</p><p>Somehow, Callum’s art has improved. She runs her fingers over the charcoal marks, the closest she can be to him now.</p><p>Ever.</p><p>He has captured a sweet moment between Soren’s wife and child, his practiced hand capturing all the nuance and detail that makes such small moments precious. Rayla’s fingers caress the worn parchment, imaging it some how connects her to Callum in some way.</p><p>She wishes she could tell him how beautiful the drawing is.</p><p>Duty calls and Soren reluctantly says his goodbyes. He gathers her in a crushing hug, almost as an afterthought and she squeezes her eyes against biting tears. She can’t even remember the last time someone held her with affection like this. Though, its not exactly the nicest of hugs. Soren holds her a little too tight and his armour bites into her chest. Still, it is something and in the end she’s not the one to let go.</p><p>As she washes for dinner that night, she notices peculiar bruise across her sternum. She recognises it, something about the square shape igniting her memory and she remembers laughing with Callum at the Storm Spire after Soren had embraced him in a similar crushing bear hug.</p><p>She chuckles to herself, thinking Callum will find their matching bruises funny until it suddenly dawns on her, this is another thing she cannot share with him.</p><p>The banquet hall is bustling. She knows Callum is here, having seen him enter with Ezran.</p><p>And his fiancée.</p><p>Her eyes continually scan the crowd for any sign of him. It feels easier to have him where she can see him. She doesn’t want to be surprised by him, though in the end, that is what happens.</p><p>“Rayla.” He says her name so softly, she almost missed it.</p><p>Turning suddenly, she finds him by her side.</p><p>She starts, feeling her face grow red. “Callum?” His name slips out, but nothing else does.</p><p>“Can we…” he pauses, considering his words. “Would you dance with me?”</p><p>Rayla’s heart shudders and she can feel her breathing grow more rapid. “I’m not sure it’s a good idea.” She speaks quietly, but he seems to hear her well enough.</p><p>“Please?” He steps a little closer, his eyes glassy. “For old times sake.”</p><p>Rayla swallows past the lump in her throat. Her mind screams at her to object, but instead she finds herself taking his offered hand and allowing him to guide her to the dance floor.</p><p>His fingers against hers feel both strange and familiar. His palms are a little more calloused than when they first met. He had soft hands back then, the hands of a boy who didn’t do much manual labour. She used to tease him about it. Calling him pampered prince as he ran his thumb along the rough skin of her palms.</p><p>She wonders if her hand on his shoulder feels as warm as where he is touching her waist.</p><p>He seems miles away, breathing softly and evenly as they slowly drift across the floor. His dancing has also improved, not that they did much human style dancing in their brief time together. Still, she can tell his rhythm is far better, he’s more graceful.</p><p>“I’m sorry.” His eyes are glassy as he looks out over the other dancing couples. He glances at her, looking ashamed. “I shouldn’t have said what I said.”</p><p>“It’s okay.” She breathes, trying to ignore the heat of his hand.</p><p>“It’s not.” He speaks quietly as they drift to the edge of the dance floor. “I’m sorry if I hurt you. That I tried to hurt you.”</p><p>She remains silent. She doesn’t want to admit how much his words cut through her.</p><p>Nor how much she craved hearing him say he still loved her. She hadn’t even wanted to admit that to herself…</p><p>That’s a memory she has wrapped up, stored away for those quiet times where she’s alone and weak. Something she will treasure, only to be unveiled and basked in when she shattered from missing him.</p><p>“I wasn’t prepared to see you.” He continues when she doesn’t speak. “It… brought it all back.” He sighs.</p><p>“I’m sorry.” She whispers.</p><p>“I am too.”</p><p>Sorry for everything, she thinks. For how this has all turned out. Not in any way how they wanted. When he had saved her from her plunge off the Storm Spire it seemed like that was it…</p><p>Their happy ending.</p><p>What fools they were.</p><p>“Can...” He pauses to steady himself. “Can we at least be friends?” He looks at her, eyes searching her face.</p><p>The ache in her chest is almost all consuming. “No, Callum.” She feels the tear run down her cheek but makes no move to wipe it.</p><p>His face contorts in misery. “Why?” His voice is thin. “Rayla, we were friends before...” He takes a deep breath. “Best friends.”</p><p>She turns her face away. “We can’t go back to that after-”</p><p>“Please.” He moves around to look her in the eye. “I’ll never say anything about how I... l...” He takes a moment. “I just want you in my life, Rayla.”</p><p>She snorts, bitter and hurting. “And what, I’m supposed to watch you get married? Have children? A life?” She blinks away tears. “We can never be <em>just</em> friends, Callum. You must know that.”</p><p>He abruptly stops their slow waltz and stares at her.</p><p>She can see he does know it. The temptation will always be too great.</p><p>They’re not apart because of an imbalance in temperament or unresolved personal conflict. They’re apart because of outside forces. They’re apart so she can keep him alive.</p><p>The life they could have had flashes before her eyes. A wedding in the Silvergrove and another in Katolis. Children with pointed ears and five fingers on each hand.</p><p>Together.</p><p>Happy.</p><p>But it is a fantasy.</p><p>She can’t look at him anymore. Cannot stand his warm hand in hers or the misery in his forest green eyes. She cannot take seeing that he wants her as much as she wants him… knowing they can never be.</p><p>It was a mistake coming here.</p><p>“I have to go.” She breathes, pushing away from him.</p><p>“Rayla” He grabs her hand, but she pulls free without looking back at him.</p><p>She rushes to her room, avoiding eye contact with those mulling around the hallways. She slams the door shut behind her, her breath catching, before she sinks down against the rough wood, sobbing.</p><p>This is harder than anything she ever imagined.</p><p>She wants nothing more than to go to him. To fall into his arms. To kiss him, feel his skin against hers.</p><p>To have him tell her he loves her over and over.</p><p>She bites down on her bottom lip as she whimpers in agony, pulling her legs close against her chest.</p><p>She thought she was beyond this...</p><p>They had such a short time together.</p><p>When she first left, she had hoped she could wrap everything up quickly. Then she could go to him and beg forgiveness. Show him evidence that Viren was dead, that they could relax.</p><p>But Viren had evaded her all these years… and things had dragged on too long to consider seeking Callum out again.</p><p>Not until she was forced to see him again.</p><p>A light knocking on her door startles her out of her painful reverie.</p><p>“Rayla.”</p><p>His voice is soft through the heavy oak.</p><p>She takes a deep, shuddering breath. She knows she should ignore him. She’s not strong enough now...</p><p>“Please.” He asks softly. “Please. Let’s not leave it like this.” A pause. “You’re leaving tomorrow. I....I don’t want that to be our goodbye.”</p><p>She sighs, trying to compose herself. She gets to her feet, wiping her eyes and smoothing her hair. Taking a deep breath, she opens the door.</p><p>He’s there before her, looking handsome and earnest and as desolate as she feels.</p><p>Against her better judgement, she opens the door wider and lets him in.</p><p>He appears a little shocked at first but eagerly steps inside.</p><p>She closes the door, and they stare at each other.</p><p>She has no idea what to say.</p><p>Really, there’s nothing <em>to</em> say.</p><p>She doesn’t <em>want</em> to say goodbye. She still loves him, and he still loves her.  </p><p>It’s all out in the open now.</p><p>He knows. They both do.</p><p>There’s no denying it. </p><p>He doesn’t push her though. Instead, he stands a respectable distance from her.</p><p>But... she wants him to <em>push</em>, to ask for more, to beg.</p><p>Because she wants to give in.</p><p>And... he just stands there.</p><p>He takes a shaky breath. “I... I just hope you’re happy.” His voice breaks and he looks away. “I just want you to be happy, even if it’s not with-” His breath catches, and he cannot continue.</p><p>She stares at him, willingly him to look at her.</p><p>She wants him to step towards her. To reach for her. To kiss her.</p><p>Because she won’t resist now. She will let him...</p><p>She will give in. Relent. Surrender.</p><p>But he has listened to her. Understood her protests and he doesn’t press her.</p><p>He just wants to say goodbye.</p><p>Truly.</p><p>She steps up to him, against him, one hand on his side, another snaking through his auburn hair.</p><p>He inhales sharply, his hands moving to hover over her.</p><p>But not touching… not quite...</p><p>She sighs, pressing her face against his neck. “Can we pretend?” She breathes him in. Lavender soap and charcoal.</p><p> “Pretend?” His voice is barely a whisper.</p><p>“For tonight?” She leans her cheek against his. “Just pretend for tonight.”</p><p>She knows this is a bad idea. No good can come from it.</p><p>But they never had a proper goodbye.</p><p>“Can we pretend we could be together tonight?” She whispers, her whole body trembling.</p><p>He gasps, leaning into her, his eyes falling closed.</p><p>She places a soft kiss on his parted lips and feels him shudder.</p><p>Bringing her other hand up to cup his face, she kisses him again… her heart falling when he doesn’t respond.</p><p>His hands still hover just over her, ghosting across her skin.</p><p>So close…</p><p>He’s being the sensible one now. She knows logically it’s good one of them is, but she cannot help the gentle sob that escapes her throat.</p><p>She steps back, futilely trying to blink back tears. “I’m sorry.”</p><p>He opens his eyes but doesn’t look at her. “I should go.”</p><p>Rayla’s throat closes, forcing her to nod rather than speak.</p><p>After a beat, he sighs and turns to the door.</p><p>She steps closer to him, wanting to reach out and touch him one last time, but she stops herself just before she does, her fingers hovering in the space between them.</p><p>Callum grasps the door handle. She can see the shake in his hand. He takes a deep breath and turns his head towards her and finally looks up at her.</p><p>She can see the longing in his eyes.</p><p>He wants this too, even if it means nothing but pain tomorrow.</p><p>He pauses for a second then strides forward, closing the distance between them. His hands clutch her waist tightly and he crushes his lips against hers. Rayla cries out in relief, her fingers once again tangling in his hair. They stumble backwards until her thighs hit the bed. She collapses down and attempts to pull him with her, but he remains standing. She looks up at him, her breathing coming in pants. She knows him well enough to know what he is thinking.</p><p>They shouldn’t. This is a bad idea. They will only feel worse after.</p><p>But like her, he clearly cannot resist.</p><p>Swallowing heavily, he joins her on the bed, his body covering hers. She sighs at the steady feel of his weight over her, arching against him. He drops his lips to her neck and she shudders, clutching at his shoulders. He clearly has not forgotten how to get a reaction out of her.</p><p>It doesn’t feel like any time has passed since they’ve been together like this. His breath still hitches in the same way when she runs her fingers through his thick hair, and he makes that same self-satisfied snort as she pushes herself against him when he sucks strongly on the soft skin of her jugular.</p><p>But he has changed in some ways. When he leans back to help her remove his tunic, she can see his shoulders are broader, more defined. His arms are a little less tan than when they were younger.</p><p>All that time spent indoors negotiating treaties.</p><p>The runes on his arms look like Skywing tattoos. She runs her finger along the one closest to his wrist. Callum’s eyes dart from her face to her finger and he takes a deep breath. She’s afraid he’s going to speak, to realise this is a mistake so she pushes herself up on her elbows and kisses him again.</p><p>He responds immediately, kissing her deeply as she lays back on the pillow.</p><p>Clumsily, they make light work of their remaining clothes. Rayla’s heart skips a beat at the exquisite feeling on his skin against hers.</p><p>She feels like she is drowning in him, overwhelmed by his lips and breath and touch. Not a day has gone by since she fled Katolis where she has not thought of him.</p><p>When she had imagined this, their first time together (her <em>first </em>time), she assumed it would be frenzied, quick. The eternity spent apart would have left them desperate and hungry, but Callum is moving almost painfully slowly. She wants him so urgently, yet she cannot resist the gentle torture that is his body against hers, his soft lips on her skin, skilled hands causing her to grasp and moan.</p><p>He pushes into her achingly slowly, his eyes on hers. She drags her fingers along his back and shoulders, but he ignores her silent pleas. Fully sheathed, he leans forward to kiss her again, and she whimpers as he begins to move.</p><p>And still he takes it slow, pulling back, changing angle if he senses she is close to her release.</p><p>She understands why he is doing it, this will be their only time, he wants to savour it, but she is beginning to go mad with tension.</p><p>With a growl, she flips him onto his back, planting her hands on his chest. Her heart skips a beat as his eyes pass over body as she straddles him, appearing to linger briefly on that bruise across her chest. He runs his hands up her thighs as she begins to move again, his eyes rolling back in his head once before returning to her face.</p><p>She can see him losing his control.</p><p>She rolls her hips, and he gasps loudly, gripping her tightly by the rear. She imagines there will be marks there tomorrow.  </p><p>He sits up, pulling her into his lap as they move together. Both of their breathing is fast now, coming in unsteady pants. She can feel herself unravelling, nearing completion. Callum grabs her tightly around the waist, his movements becoming harsh and frantic.</p><p>He is close too.</p><p>He moves forward to nip at her neck as he pulls her impossibly tight against him and it is all she needs. She cries out as she comes, dimly aware of him whispering her name against her ear as he loses control too.</p><p>He pulls her face against his to kiss her as they ride out the aftershocks.</p><p>He’s still kissing her as her heart begins to slow, her breathing returning to normal. She runs her fingers through his hair as she lazily kisses him back.</p><p>She doesn’t want to open her eyes. If she keeps them closed, she can pretend they are in their old room. His old room. She can pretend they are together. That this is some perfect present where they have snuck away from the party to enjoy some private time.  That they are the one preparing for <em>their</em> wedding celebration.</p><p>That they don’t have to part ways.</p><p>That they are happy.</p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>You guys sure you want the 'happy' ending...?</p><p>Catch me on <a href="https://www.tumblr.com/blog/zuppizup">my Tumblr</a>, if you want to chat, get fic snippets and be subjected to my random nonsense.</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>And so ends chapter one of (sort of) my response to TTM. </p>
<p>Thanks for reading!</p>
<p>(And yes, the title is from an Adele song)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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